"My husband Andrew and I have been foster parents for 7 years. We have had lots of positive experiences whilst fostering.

One that stands out to me is when we had a young boy who was on the spectrum and meant to be staying for one night. He came to our home terrified and was very difficult to engage with that first night. He went to school the following day not knowing where he would be sleeping that night. At school he attempted self-harm and wound up at the hospital. The agency called me in the afternoon and asked if he could stay with us again. I said yes, he could. I had two pet birds at the time and when he came back home, I told him that the birds had missed him and that we were all glad he came back to stay with us. So, from that moment this young man felt a sense of being wanted and belonging and he settled nicely. He stayed with us for about 18 months. Just knowing that you are welcome and wanted in a home is enough for these kids. 

I think the best tip I could give another carer is to try not to imagine what to expect with any new placement. Each child is different, most kids are not textbook children and most have been through a lot in their short lives. Making sure that child feel welcome and wanted in your home is very important and even though you may not see it straight away, those kids will show you eventually that they appreciate you being there for them.  

I have contacted FCAV a few times over those years, I have had questions regarding different orders that children have been on that FCAV could easily explain to me and also I have asked for advice regarding some medical issues with one child in my care as well as questions regarding maintaining contact with that child after the placement ended. FCAV have been very knowledgeable and understanding with any query I have had."